Draupadi’s Rebuke of Yudhishthira

Because of the love people felt for the Pandavas, and especially for Yudhishthira, more and more Brahmins, sages, rishis, and other well-wishers kept coming to Kamyaka forest. Everyone wished to comfort King Yudhishthira and spend time in his company. So the forest was always full of guests, visitors, and people who had come just to see them.

But Dharmaraj Yudhishthira did not feel that such a life was true exile. His heart strongly wished to leave Kamyaka forest and go to a quieter place. The time had now come to choose what forest would be best for their long life in exile. In this matter, Yudhishthira trusted Arjuna's judgment more than anyone else's. So he placed this duty upon the third Pandava.

"Arjuna," he said, "we must live in exile for twelve years. All of you together look for such a place in this great forest where there are many deer, birds, flowers, fruits, and lakes. That place should be free from trouble. And see that sages and rishis, with whom we may keep holy company, also live there."

Arjuna bowed and answered with deep respect, "Maharaj, you know all the news of the sages, the worlds of the gods, and Brahmalok. So we know that your knowledge of this earthly world must be far greater than ours. In choosing a place, your sharp sight and sense of dharma cannot be matched."

He continued, "Maharaj, because of the service you have done to gods, Brahmins, and rishis, by their blessings you can move fearlessly in any place on this earth."

Yudhishthira replied, "You have spoken truly, Arjuna. But younger brother, now we must build our hut. So we need a place that is safe from every side. This matter of safety depends on your judgment and Bhima's. In this matter, I depend on both of you."

Arjuna then pointed out a forest and said, "Maharaj, do you see that Dwaita forest there? That place is safe from every side. It has pleasing lakes, flowers, fruits, and wild animals. Ascetics practice penance there. Is that not the kind of place you desire? I think we can live happily in that Dwaita forest."

Yudhishthira nodded. "You have spoken well, brother. I too feel the same. Besides, Dwaita forest is also known as a holy place. Come, let us go there."

When people learned that Yudhishthira would go deeper from Kamyaka forest, countless men and women came from the nearby place called Kurujangal to see him. They thought of Yudhishthira as their true king. When they heard he was leaving, they were filled with sorrow. They gathered around the Pandavas and cried aloud together.

"Alas, alas, Maharaj, Maharaj, you are leaving! What will happen to us now? We always found shelter near you. Maharaj, we beg you, do not leave us like this. We too wish to go with you. We will not be able to live without seeing you, Maharaj."

Then they pleaded still more, "You need not worry about us. We will arrange our own living somehow. Please only allow us to stay with you, Rajan, Rajan, allow us to stay with you. Do not leave us like this, do not go like this."

Yudhishthira spoke to them with kindness. "You all love us so much and show us such affection. We shall truly remain forever indebted to you. But we must fulfill our vow of exile. Bless us, so that we may complete that vow with calm minds and without trouble. Now give us leave, for we will begin our journey toward Dwaita forest."

Those around him said, "After twelve years of exile and one year in hiding, King Yudhishthira will again win back his kingdom. Then you all may go to Indraprastha and live there happily and peacefully with him. There is no need to say how dear you all are to the Maharaj in this time of sorrow."

Then, hearing the cries of victory from the people of Gurujangal, the five Pandavas left Kamyaka forest. With them went Rishi Dhaumya and Draupadi. A few Brahmins learned in the Vedas and some ancient ascetics also went with Yudhishthira toward that deep forest.

When they came to Dwaita forest, the five Pandavas built their huts on the bank of the Saraswati River. Around their huts stood rows of sal, mahua, palm, kadamba, arjuna, and many other trees. Yudhishthira looked upon the whole forest and was greatly pleased.

Bhima brought fine ripe fruits for the sages, rishis, and Brahmins who were staying with the Pandavas. With those fruits they served their guests. Rishi Dhaumya carefully guided them in sacred rites, shraddha, offerings to the ancestors, and many other vows.

So a few days passed in that holy place.

Then one day the great sage Markandeya arrived in Dwaita forest. He seemed like the very living form of eternal dharma. Wonderful was his radiance, and unmatched was his wisdom. The moment the five Pandavas saw him, they quickly rose to their feet. The other sages, rishis, and Brahmins there also stood up with folded hands.

After offering him the proper water and worship, Yudhishthira spoke humbly, "I bow to the great sage, Lord Markandeya, who is most ancient, most wise, the sage of sages, and whose service even blesses the world of the gods. O great sage, we are blessed by your coming. Our birth has become meaningful. O lord, be pleased with us."

Markandeya answered, "Dharmaputra Yudhishthira, I am greatly pleased by your humility, devotion, prayer, and service, greatly pleased."

Yet as he looked upon the five Pandavas, a slight smile passed across his face.

Yudhishthira saw it and was at once surprised and troubled. Never before had any sage, rishi, or Brahmin mocked them after seeing their miserable state. Could even the great sage Markandeya do such a thing? Or had Yudhishthira misunderstood? The sage remained silent, still smiling gently as he looked steadily at the five Pandavas and Draupadi.

At last Yudhishthira spoke in a troubled voice. "Maharshi, all the ascetics here have become deeply sorrowful on seeing our condition. They share our pain. All these sages and rishis are sad. Then why did you smile with joy on seeing me before them all, O great sage? I am greatly surprised. So I was forced to ask this harsh question. Please forgive my boldness."

Markandeya's face softened with compassion. "Child Yudhishthira, I did not mock you. I did not look down on your sadness. Son, your suffering did not fill me with pride or arrogance. I am not so harsh. Yet one thing is true, seeing you has brought me joy. Do you know why? Your dress of deer-skin and your forest exile remind me of Shri Ramachandra, son of Dasharatha."

Yudhishthira looked up in wonder. "Shri Ramachandra? What are you saying, Maharshi?"

"Yes, son," Markandeya replied. "On seeing the truthful Pandavas, I feel as if I am seeing before my eyes that truthful prince who lived in the forest. Long, long ago I saw that Shri Rama with my own eyes. Yudhishthira, today it is as if I have seen him once again, child. That is why such joy shone on my face and in my eyes."

Yudhishthira bowed his head at once. "O best of sages, forgive me. Without understanding, I have insulted you. I could not grasp the depth of your true vision. I am guilty before you, O sage, forgive me."

Markandeya blessed him and said, "Yudhishthira, you are sinless, one without enemies. You have committed no fault, child. Like fire and the sun, your fame and radiance shine in their own glory beyond all other beings. But remember one thing always, Yudhishthira: all creatures in this world act according to the law set by the Creator. So it does not suit anyone to commit adharma by thinking himself strong."

Yudhishthira answered with folded hands, "O Maharshi, every word of yours is like the Veda to me. I will remember this teaching all my life. Please accept my bowed greeting, O revered one."

The sage then said, "By your own power you will win back your royal fortune from the Kauravas. After passing through the pain of exile, you will again wear the royal crown. Yudhishthira, do not be sad, child. Keep your strength, truth, and greatness unharmed."

After blessing the five Pandavas, Draupadi, Rishi Dhaumya, and all the other ascetics and Brahmins, the great sage Markandeya took leave of Yudhishthira and departed toward the north.

By the power and greatness of his blessing, Dwaita forest seemed truly filled with the sound of Rig and Sama hymns. It was as if dharma itself had taken form there. The chanting of the Vedas by the sages mixed with the twang of the Pandavas' bows. In the bond between Brahmins and Kshatriyas, Dwaita forest took on a wonderful beauty. By the blessings of rare sages like Bhrigu, Angira, Agastya, and Vashistha, the courage and strength of the Pandavas began to shine even more strongly.

The wisdom of the Brahmins and the courage of the Kshatriyas together began in that forest to shape a marvelous picture of the future. Just as fire works with the help of wind, so Brahmin and Kshatriya dharma together began to sow the seeds of an unconquerable future. By the blessings of the Brahmins and ascetics, the Pandavas no longer doubted that royal fortune would one day rise again on Yudhishthira's brow.

Yet one wound still remained fresh and terrible in that forest life—the insult Draupadi had suffered in the Kuru court.

Yudhishthira was always thoughtful and deep-minded. No matter how much his heart repented, little showed upon the outside. But Draupadi had been born of fire, and the flame of that fierce insult kept burning within her more and more. She had still not received justice or remedy from Yudhishthira.

So one day she went and stood before Dharmaraj.

"Maharaj," she said, "look at our fate. In what misery we wander through forests and wild places, while that evil Duryodhana sits in Hastinapura with his people and enjoys himself. Surely our sorrow has not touched his stone heart at all. Otherwise, when you yourself put on deer-skin and came out with your head bowed, when all the people of the city cried out in grief, I saw with my own eyes the victorious smiles on the faces of Shakuni, Duryodhana, Dushasana, and Karna alone, Maharaj. Will there be no punishment for this, no remedy for this?"

Yudhishthira answered gently, "Panchali, be calm. We are all under fate. What fate has marked out for us, what choice do we have but to accept it, Panchali? A person can never go beyond his destiny."

Draupadi's eyes flashed. "Fate? You call deceit fate, Maharaj? You yourself know that the Gandhara king Shakuni did nothing but cheat. You were made to lose unfairly in the game of dice, Maharaj. The insult done to you was not what you deserved. Leaving Indraprastha, equal to the city of Indra, leaving your empire, leaving the royal dress envied by the three worlds, you had to come down into the dust of the road, Maharaj. Once cooks wearing bracelets and earrings arranged with their own hands all your food and service. And now you live on forest fruits. Dirty clothes like those of a beggar do not suit you, Maharaj Yudhishthira. Do you not feel your own honor has been broken?"

Yudhishthira said, "Krishnaa, I have forgotten nothing. The things you speak of are not unknown to me. Every moment I remember them. Every event of the dice game, every moment when you were insulted in that Kuru court, remains in my mind. Dear one, perhaps you do not know, but my nights pass without sleep. Not only in sorrow, but in waiting. I am only waiting."

But Draupadi's sorrow only rose higher. "You may not grieve, Maharaj, but I do. Hear me, Maharaj Yudhishthira. When I see these five Pandavas covered in dust, my heart breaks with sorrow. Kings from many lands stood around you, and among them you shone like the sun, Maharaj. Where is that radiance now, where is it? You have grown dim, Maharaj, you have grown dim. Before the splendor of the five Pandavas, gods, yakshas, and men all seemed pale. Where is that amazing strength and power that always surrounded you, Maharaj? Where is your noble rule now? From your house cooks and servants carried rich food in fine vessels to serve the guest Brahmins. The roads of Indraprastha used to ring with cries of victory in your name, Maharaj."

Yudhishthira answered, "Krishnaa, do not grieve. A person is only a puppet in the hands of fate. Nothing in life remains forever. To be torn by sorrow for desired things is a sign of weakness."

"Weakness?" Draupadi cried. "If your justice and dharma call this weakness, Maharaj, then I am ready to accept this weakness. You may live in peace with your justice, Maharaj, but I cannot. That Arjuna who carries the Gandiva, that mighty Bhima, that handsome Nakula, and that Sahadeva whom you love so dearly, those best of men whom even the gods and Devarshi Narada come to see, I can no longer bear to see them in such poverty, Maharaj, no longer bear it. Where have all your comfort, greatness, and power gone? Where has your glory gone? The whole world knows you as destroyers of enemies. What does that world see today, Maharaj? It sees how helpless the Pandavas are. No, Maharaj, even if you can bear this sight, I can no longer do so."

"Panchali, Panchali, it is not so," Yudhishthira replied. "Arjuna's Gandiva and Bhima's mighty arms will not become false. But there is a fixed time for everything. You too must wait for that time. Fate is testing us now. This is the time to remain controlled."

"Controlled?" Draupadi said bitterly. "What are you saying, Maharaj? Look at Bhima, Maharaj. Bhima, who among the five Pandavas loved food the most, who was cheerful and playful, the protector of the Pandavas, that very Bhimasena now brings fruits like a poor man. He fills his stomach with roots and fruits. Bhimasena, who would not be satisfied even with the finest meals of rice and meat, look with your own eyes at the condition of that brother of yours, Maharaj. Does even this not awaken your anger?"

Yudhishthira answered in a grave voice, "Draupadi, you know the scriptures. Then why do you not understand that from anger comes a person's ruin? An angry man may even kill his teacher. There is nothing such people will not do, Panchali. They do not even know what they are doing or why they are doing it. Those who grow angry at another's anger cannot save anyone, Panchali. But the one who can hold back anger by wisdom, him the wise call truly radiant."

Draupadi bowed her head slightly, but she did not stop. "Forgive me, Maharaj. A Kshatriya can never be without anger. Where has your Kshatriya dharma gone? A Kshatriya who shows no power in a time of danger is despised by all, Maharaj. One who always forgives suffers endless loss. Servants, enemies, and common people also scorn him. That too is said in the scriptures. Vrikodara Bhima alone can destroy the Kauravas. Only because he has not received your permission, he has become restless. Even after seeing this, will you still sit silent, Maharaj?"

Yudhishthira said, "Draupadi, I have already told you, anger can never be true power. Even angry men fear true power. In whose heart that power rises, victory is certain for him everywhere on earth. And you know this too, Panchali, forgiveness is the dharma of the great."

"Forgiveness?" Draupadi said, her voice trembling like flame. "Seeing me, Draupadi the daughter of Drupada, Draupadi the sister of Dhrishtadyumna, Draupadi the daughter-in-law of the great Pandu, Draupadi the wife of the five mighty heroes, living in exile, you still speak of forgiveness, Dharmaraj? Then is there no manliness left in this world? Where has all your great strength and heroism gone?"

If anyone besides Draupadi in Dwaita forest was angry and impatient, it was Bhimasena.

Out of respect, reverence, and discipline toward his elder brother, he had held back his words until then. But on that day, seeing the fire of Draupadi, he could no longer remain silent. After Draupadi's insult in the Kuru court, Bhima had taken terrible vows. He had sworn to break Duryodhana's thigh and tear open Dushasana's chest and drink his blood. The desire to fulfill that vow gave him no peace for even a single moment. Yet no path to fulfill it lay open before him. So he had been writhing inwardly, pressing his suffering deep into his heart.

Now Draupadi's burning words broke the dam within him. Furious, breathing heavily again and again, Bhimasena spoke in an impatient voice.

"Maharaj, why should we hide in this heat after giving up dharma, wealth, and pleasure? We were not defeated in a righteous war, Maharaj. We were defeated by deceit. Have you seen scavenging jackals, Maharaj? They snatch meat from a lion's mouth and run away. In just that way Duryodhana has snatched away our kingdom. And we will sit here and watch the Kauravas enjoy themselves, Maharaj?"

Yudhishthira looked at him steadily and said, "Younger brother, the cause of your anger is fully just. I cannot even blame your complaint against me. It is because of my wrong that you suffer like this today. Out of greed for Duryodhana's kingdom, I fell victim to Shakuni's deceit. Duryodhana had made slaves of us all. From that state, Panchali saved us all. But Bhima, why did you not oppose me in that assembly?"

Bhima answered, "I did not oppose you, brother."

Then his voice darkened. "Maharaj, if Arjuna had not stopped me that day—"

Yudhishthira interrupted him. "Yes, you wished to burn my hand, Bhima. You had your iron mace with you. Why did you not throw that mace at me in the royal court, brother? I saw you striking it again and again with all your strength. Why attack me now in this forest of penance, when you did not attack me then? The vow with which I came to this forest, I can never break that vow."

Bhima cried out, "Thirteen years of exile, Maharaj! If we must wait for such a long time, our lives will end before that, and we will never gain the kingdom. By the strong influence of Brahmins and holy company, your royal understanding has been ruined, Maharaj. Are you no longer a Kshatriya?"

"Be calm, Bhima," Yudhishthira said. "If you grow this impatient, you will never escape danger."

Bhima answered, "How can I be calm, Maharaj? What punishment for what sin are you giving us? How did you gain so much mercy like a Brahmin? Where has that Kshatriya fire gone, Maharaj? Out of thirteen years, only thirteen months have passed. Such a long wait still remains, do you understand, Maharaj? Count these thirteen months as thirteen years, or death is very near for us, Maharaj."

Yudhishthira said with firmness, "Bhima, it does not suit you to speak like a foolish youth, brother. You are not speaking after proper thought, younger brother. You know that the kings who once followed us and belonged to our line are no longer with us. Do you know where they are now? With Duryodhana. They all seek to please Duryodhana. So we should not depend on those kings for support."

Bhima answered at once, "I need no one, Maharaj. Arjuna's Gandiva and the strength of my arms, these two alone are enough to destroy Duryodhana. Arjuna will protect me with the Gandiva, and I alone will destroy Duryodhana and Dushasana, Maharaj."

But Yudhishthira spoke carefully, as one who saw many dangers ahead. "Bhima, before you can reach Duryodhana, you must cross many paths, brother. Kripa, Drona, and Grandfather Bhishma, none of them are unjust men. But each of them is bound by duty to Hastinapura. So they are tied to the throne of Hastinapura. To protect Duryodhana, all of them will pour out their very last strength. And beyond them there is one more terrible great warrior, Karna. Karna is deeply hostile toward us. And you know how great a hero he is, Bhima. Unless these mighty warriors are overcome, it will not be possible to reach Duryodhana, brother, not possible. Be calm, younger brother. Whatever you do, do it with wisdom. Emotion and anger destroy a person. If we must fight such powerful enemies, we too must prepare ourselves in the same way. This is called the time of preparation. That is the stage we are in now, brother. First we must increase our own strength. So I say again, be calm, younger brother. This is not yet the time for anger. Learn to be patient."

Bhima's chest rose and fell. "Patience? Maharaj, you ask me to be patient? Can you not see that Arjuna, who thinks no archer in the whole world equal to him, sits silent and sighs deeply? King and great hero Arjuna, Arjuna who bears the Gandiva, endures all this insult in silence only because he cannot speak against you. I and Draupadi have spoken before you for all of them, Maharaj. Nakula, Sahadeva, our old mother, all remain silent under your influence and the weight of your dharma. They have become dazed, Maharaj. Your friends too are now just the same."

Yudhishthira answered, "I know, Bhima. This pain is not only yours and Panchali's, this pain belongs to all of us. Yet I say, the time for war has still not come, brother. Our very close friend Srenjaya, King Drupada, Dhrishtadyumna, and above all Krishna himself will stand by us. Along with them there are I and Arjuna."

Bhima said, "Because Arjuna guarded Indraprastha, even Lord Indra never dared raise his eyes toward that kingdom. Yet you say that even we few fearless heroes together cannot destroy the Kauravas? Why, Maharaj? What is it that you fear so much? Has your wisdom been destroyed?"

Yudhishthira replied, "No, brother, my wisdom has not been lost. I stand in clear and pure understanding. Nor am I unaware of your heroism and Arjuna's unconquerable courage."

Bhima pressed him further. "Then are you certain? Are you afraid only for the keeping of your truth? Listen, Maharaj, I tell you."

Yudhishthira said, "I know what the scriptures say, and what rule they give, brother. I also know how the count of thirteen years of exile and one year in hiding might be reduced by some means, Bhima."

Bhima stared at him. "Then what is the cause of your discouragement, Maharaj? Please tell me, do not remain silent."

Now Yudhishthira spoke plainly. "Bhima, Bhishma, Kripa, and Drona all possess divine weapons. When we stand face to face with the enemy in battle, we will fall behind in that contest of weapons. Arjuna alone having one Brahmashira is not enough, brother. If we are to win against all these bearers of divine weapons, we too must obtain such weapons. Before that, before that time, to dream of war is mere foolishness."

After these words, great unrest spread through Dwaita forest.

There was no lack of loyalty, love, and affection among the Pandavas themselves. All had accepted Yudhishthira as one worthy of a guru's place. Yet after the terrible insult to Draupadi, no one truly knew peace. It was true that the pain and burning in Draupadi's heart wounded the Pandavas just as deeply. But among them all, only Bhimasena could direct sharp words of complaint toward Yudhishthira.

And I, Krishna Dvaipayana Vyasa, knew that a great war was coming. No one would be able to stop its course. Yet before that war, it was necessary that peace and affection remain strong among the Pandavas themselves. Not only this—Yudhishthira's heart had also become filled with fear because of the Kauravas. So now I had to come to Yudhishthira.

I stood before him and said, "Child Yudhishthira, I have come to you for a great need. Son, I wish to speak to you alone."

Yudhishthira at once received me with honor. "Mahatma Vyasadeva, we are truly blessed, lord, to receive your sight so suddenly. Are you living well by skill and wisdom in the life of the forest, son?"

Then, with humility, he spoke of his own state. "We are all physically safe, but Maharshi, our minds have become restless. Countless questions, problems, and worries have risen within us, lord. Because of this worry, none of us can remain steady. Even with so many holy men around us, with saintly company and peaceful surroundings, balance is disappearing from our lives, lord. You are the knower within, divine one. Show us the right path, Maharshi."

I said to him, "That is why I have come, son. I know that deep inside you are greatly afraid. Bhishma, Karna, Drona, Duryodhana, and Ashvatthama fill your mind with great fear, do they not? But son, if that fear remains, your inner strength will not awaken. Yudhishthira, I have come to destroy that fear in your mind through the power of scripture-taught action. Listen to me carefully. Then follow exactly the path I tell you. In this way all the pain in your mind will be destroyed. Otherwise you will never find peace."

Yudhishthira bowed and replied, "I accept every word of yours as scripture, Maharshi. Tell me, what must I do? With a single mind I will do exactly that."

I knew what had to be done. The terror in Yudhishthira's mind had to be removed through the sacred acts taught by the scriptures. Yudhishthira, bearer and keeper of dharma and merit, still believed that after fourteen years he would surely regain his kingdom. Duryodhana would never willingly return the empire he had seized. But this was not Yudhishthira's weakness, nor was it lack of wisdom. This faith itself was his truth. He was truth in heart and soul, and so even the shadow of falsehood and adharma did not fall upon him.

At the same time, a deep fear of the Kaurava heroes lived within him, especially fear of Karna. If that fear was not destroyed now, dharma would never win. The son of dharma had to be awakened against the adharma that stood against him.